A shopping trip
(This is an article from a previous website)
A two-part narrative of shopping events over two days. I originally wrote this as email, hence the inlined layout.
6th August 2003
Chelsea Chelsea
Hi all,
Just a little tale to warm your heart.
Chelsea 1
---------
I wasn't working this week, and decided to do some window shopping as
well as keep an eye out for something suitable for the Seahorse Ball
(decided not to get something made - too much hassle and cost).
While browsing the shops in Chadstone (in boy mode), I walked into the
Chelsea store there. They still had their 50%-off sale. A shop
assistant came up and greeted me, and then:
Her: "Everything's half price this time"
Me: "Oh you remember me?"
Her: "Yeah, you bought that long white cardigan"
I nodded, and was quite delighted that she did. I had bought that at
the beginning of their end-of-financial year sales. We exchanged a bit
more pleasantries (which I've forgotten now), and then:
Me: "If I remember next time I come in, I'll bring a photo"
Her: "Please do, I'd love to see it"
Me: "Okay, I'll try"
And all this while, the conversation was conducted in a very friendly
tone, and I was so happy about her response and curiousity that I
couldn't keep smiling. Anyway, after that, I looked around a bit more,
and left to look at the other shops.
Chelsea 2
---------
My travels then took me to Southlands (Which I've never perused
properly, I was previously always rushing to get something) where I
walked it from one end to the other, going into each fashion shop as I
met them. And at the end was another Chelsea shop, went in, and not
before long, a shop assistant came to greet me, exchanged pleasantries,
then:
Her: "Do you have something coming up?"
Me: "Um yeah . . . ", (I thought: ah, what the heck), "ah, crossdresser's ball"
Her: (Looking a bit surprised and interested), "Really? When is that?"
Me: "Um, August 30th, around Ashwood"
And I forget the words after this point, but then she kept wanting to
help me by showing me items off the racks and saying that this one is
nice because of so-and-so, and that one is nice because of so-and-so.
It wasn't actually helping me at all since I really was just looking
around (and quite competent at doing so) and it was all getting rather
distracting, but I allowed her to carry on a bit more because of
politeness.
I do remember some snippets, in no particular order:
"If some of the items don't come in the right size, we can get it for you from another store"
"This one's nice, you can also wear it during the day" (while showing me a maroon-coloured skirt from a two-piece)
Anyway, I looked around a bit more and then left with "Thanks for your help, I'll keep this store in mind".
Redux
-----
So, both visits left me with very warm fuzzy feelings. So much so that
I'm planning to drop by in girl mode sometime, just to let them see.
But, one final thing though: I visited their store in DFO afterwards:
Assistant: "Will you be okay there?"
Me: "Yep"
Assistant: "Most men have trouble wondering what her size is"
Me: "Actually, it's for myself"
Assistant: Short silence, and then some neutral reply I don't remember.
As I finished looking and left that store, I thought to myself: Oops, Oh well, you can't win them all the time :)
But since she didn't give me any strange looks, that's more than alright anyways.
------------
Well, hope you had a nice read.
Ta,
Cassie
8th August 2003
Another Field Trip : Garfunkle : Or A Girl For 14 hours
Being the last weekday before I went back to work, and continuing on from my reconnaissance trip two days ago, I decided to go shopping in girl mode, say hi to some people, and go get my dress for the Melbourne Seahorse Ball.
I've been meaning to go shopping in girl mode for a while. In the past, it's always been in boy mode, even if it means trying on girl clothes in the fitting rooms and then coming out to the stares of other shoppers when I finished (since I tend to shop in places which only sell girls stuff). Other girls have told me that they wouldn't dare try on stuff in boy mode and they find it easier to just shop in girl mode. For me, it's tended to be the reverse. I guess it probably started as a practicality since I had to shop for my own stuff before I had enough to be fully girl, and maybe it just got easier with exposure.
I already knew what dress I wanted, it was really a case of getting it, and in the correct size. I could even have got it two days ago in boy mode, but I decided to wait a bit so I could doll myself up and go have some fun (and anyway, it was about time I took another step, and not get complacent). On the way there, I planned to drop into the two Chelsea stores with very friendly staff and say hi to the two ever helpful and enthusiastic Assistants from last story. I was wearing a cream long winter cardigan that I bought from them 2 ish months ago. It seemed appropriate since it was how they first knew of me.
Chadstone
---------
First stop was Chelsea in Chadstone Shopping Centre. Getting out of the car and getting to the mall entrance was alright. Walking from there into the centre proper and then to Chelsea was scary and nervous, but that's to be expected. In my mind, I was continually reassuring myself to be calm, breathe properly, hold your chin up, don't do anything irrational, and just go get the job done. It's really a case of mind over body. I very well couldn't bolt without causing even more attention (not that I could bolt very effectively with bloody strappy heels on anyway). Plus, most people see what they expect to see.
Having said that though, some people did stare a bit. I would guess about half looked at me, and half didn't even give me a second glance. Of the first half, some would have been checking me out, some would have picked me out, and some would have been wondering whether I was girl or boy. Of course, there was no way I could ever know, but then there is no way they could all be sure I wasn't girl, so it works both ways. I just stiffened my resolve and walked past them all.
So I reached Chelsea, went in, and pretended to be browsing but trying to see if the Assistant was in. Alas, she wasn't, but then this older, senior-looking assistant comes up to me, greets me, and we start talking:
Her: "I see you're wearing one of our garments"
Me: "Yeah"
Her: "It looks good on you"
Me: "Thank you"
And then I asked her whether the Assistant was in, and when she'll next be in. I didn't get anywhere with the inquiry because there were several matching the description I gave, and I didn't know the name. But we kept talking anyway, and I got the impression that the senior assistant had probably realised who I am in boy mode (she'd probably seen me browsing in her store). She asked my name, I gave both boy and girl names, she gave hers as Teresa, and then I remember saying:
Me: "It was so scary walking into here"
Her: Some response I don't recall
Me: "No, I mean walking through the shopping centre to get to here"
Her: (With a dismissive wave of her hand) "Why? You look like a girl, you act like a girl, and you feel like a girl, so what's the problem?"
Um, yeah, my thoughts exactly :) It's just the execution which needs practice.
We chatted a bit more, then I finished the conversation so I could head off. She said she'd leave a message for the girls to let them know I was here. I left the store and walked back to my car. Again, some people looked at me a few times, but I was getting used to it by then, and anyway, it would be boring if everyone ignored me, right?
So that was Chadstone, mission satisfactorily accomplished, and off to Southland Shopping centre.
Southland
---------
Southland was pretty much the same except for some respects. There weren't as many people, plus the Chelsea store is near an entrance so I didn't walk far. Consequently almost no one looked at me a second time, and I was much more comfortable throughout. Again, the Assistant wasn't in, I chatted to a senior assistant, she was very friendly, and:
Her: "That looks very nice on you"
Me: "Thank you, only because your company designed them well"
I expect she knew I wasn't girl, and might even have remembered me as a boy two days ago, but it was so a non-issue. So we talked a bit, then I said my goodbyes. Mission also satisfactorily accomplished.
<< Interlude >>
It would have been better if both Assistants were in, but I was enjoying it enough not to lament it.
DFO
---
Next stop was DFO, where I had already seen the dress I wanted in a Garfunkle store. The first thing I noticed was that a much smaller proportion of people looked at me, sure, there were less people generally, but almost no one payed any extra attention to me. Must be something about people who shop in non-discount shopping centres, maybe they have too much time on their hands and nothing better to do.
So I went into Garfunkle. The dress was short and halter (that's all I'm saying about it until the ball). I took 3 different sizes into the fitting room to try them out. It was so wonderful being able to come out of the fitting cubicles and look at myself in the larger wall mirror, and being able to properly see how each one fits (ie. with breasts), and then turning partially to one side to see how the side profile looks, and then back to facing on to assess how the fabric was falling onto my hips and bum. It was just so cooooooooool!
Oops, I digress.
With some help and opinions from the assistants, I made my purchase. Again, I expect they knew I wasn't girl, and again, it was so a non-issue. I was presenting as a girl, so it's only natural that I was buying girl stuff.
So, dress done, main objective done, what now?
Well, I figured I'd need a bra to go with the halter, and since it's not usual that I'm shopping with breasts on, bra hunting I went. Actually, this only lasted a while, because I didn't really want to buy a new bra yet, just wanted to look. I did try on some boob-tube-like bras that I'd been eyeing for some time, only to find out they don't work with breasts forms. Oh well, the experience was worth it.
And then I decided it was time to head home for a strategic intermission.
Home
----
Got home, tried on my new dress again for a second look, played around with it a bit, played around with a couple of bras to get an idea of what sort of bra I will need to buy, finished experimenting, looked at the time. It was only around 4pm, still heaps of time before I was going out tonight. What to do? I could walk Chadstone again, but I didn't like the idea since I wouldn't have an objective in mind.
And then I remembered some discounted jackets I had been eyeing at various Garfunkle stores, remembered that two days ago (in boy mode), the assistant at Garfunkle Southland was very friendly and hinted at my dressing, decided I had time to kill, so decided to head to there and get a jacket.
<< Interlude >>
Yes, I specifically re-visited the Southland store because of the assistant, but that's because I had time and I was being girly about it. If time was pressing, I would just have gone to the closer Chadstone store.
Southland 2
-----------
So, to Garfunkle Southland. More people in the shopping centre this time, but again, not that many people paid extra attention. Into Garfunkle itself, the assistant from two days ago was in, and at the counter. I pretended to browse a few minutes, then went up to the counter and:
Me: "Hey, remember me?". She took perhaps a split-second or two before realisation dawned on her.
Me: "I was here two days ago"
Her: "Oh, Wow!"
I forget the subsequent sentences, but she was absolutely delighted with seeing me, and we chatted heaps, and it was overwhelmingly wonderful. Here are various topics, possibly in wrong order as my memory fails me.
Apparently, she's been exposed to queer things before. She told me her name and where she's from and all. She said she used to know a makeup artist back home who was very liberal and open-minded and artistic and I get the impression the artist was gay or trans or both. Plus Joanne's seen shows and performers and loved them, but hasn't seen them for a while. I presume drag shows.
Her: "Do you perform?"
Me: "Not at the moment, but I might in the future when I get up to it"
Her: "Oh, I would love to see. You must be good at it . . . You should tell me when you perform".
Me: "Uh, I don't know when that will be, it might be as long as a year from now"
Her: "Here", she writes her name on a Garfunkle business card and gives it to me, "Call me when you perform, I'll come and see".
Cool!
Her: "Are you going out tonight?"
Me: "Yes"
Her: "Party?"
Me: "Sort of", and I tell her a bit about my movements for the night.
The conversation kept getting interrupted and resumed. Interrupted because I really should look at those jackets I came to see, resumed because we just keep chatting. She was really enthusiastic, and kept showing me the new lines of nice dresses they have. We had a few rounds of her pulling something off the rack:
Her: "And this is also new, and it's lovely"
Me: "Yeah, it is"
Not that I was going to buy any of them. She must have known that (I had told her about the dress I had already bought), but we both joined in admiring how beautiful those dresses were. I think if I wanted to, I could have told her I wasn't going to buy any of them, but she would have let me try them all on anyway.
Onto other topics. She was saying that she, and I presume the chain as well, was accommodating to cross-dressers and perhaps get a few from time to time. Apparently, recently, there was a casual staff at that store who recently said to a guy who entered the store "We have nothing for you here". Joanne's opinion was that "that's no way to treat someone", and this casual girl would have to be trained and made aware that men may buy from them too.
Supposedly, Garfunkle is owned by three brothers, and at least one of them is gay, and possibly one (maybe the same one) is slightly trans.
Recently, a CD went into the store with his mum and ended up buying a colourful blue-and-purple two-piece-bodice-with-skirt which was a relatively new line. Joanne was confused at first, as both of them went into the dressing room together, and she didn't initially realise until she asked "size 16? who is it for? you or you? Oh it's for you, oh alright".
And finally, when I had bought my jacket and was about to go, this new assistant had come into the store, and Joanne introduced us (I forget her name though), and she was talking about some logistics problems with her boy, and I smilingly interjected "Yeah, don't you just hate guys?", and she agreed "Yeah, they are so unreliable".
That was fun!
So that was Southland the second time. The experience was beautiful.
I headed home, bought KFC at a drive-thru, went home, ate, re-touched-up, changed into something more appropriate, then headed out.
Home 2
------
Oh, on the way back, I ran into my neighbours. As I drove into the communal driveway, they were walking to their car. We've talked a few times before, so they know my car, and probably expected to see me driving it. They must have been puzzled at first.
What to do? Only the logical and polite thing, I waved to them as if I know them (because I do). They waved back. I parked my car, and by the time I'd gathered all my things (ie. jacket, KFC) to get out, they were already in their car, but they didn't drive off.
What to do? Again, only the logical thing. I got out of the car and walked to my unit as if nothing was wrong (because, really, nothing is wrong). There's a light above my door which is on at night. When I had reached my door, I turned around, made sure I was within the light, and waved again. I could just see the outline of them waving back. Then I went in, closed the door, and heard them drive off.
They probably had some idea already, as I hang girl items on the communal washing line.
Now they should know, I guess. But then again, (say it with me :) it's so a non-issue.
Out
---
I'm going to cut this bit short, as it's more of the same nightly outing stuff from here on. The main thrust of this narrative has been the shopping experience.
First stop was the Muse Bar, meeting up and saying hi to the tgirls who frequently come out. Then Phoebe and I went to the Diva Bar to see Psychedelica and Nova perform (well, mainly to meet up with Psychedelica and her friend, seeing Nova was just an extra, I guess). Then it was late so we all went home.
After reaching home, I calculated how long I'd been dressed up. From 1pm till 3am, 14 hours. Wow! I've been a girl for 14 hours straight. That's the longest ever. Ah, I love this life!
Ta,
Cassie Chan